I hold my sides wearily
pondering the lengths and strides I still have to take until I am authentic

Afraid to expose the vulnerable
I stare in confusion in front of the looking mirror, trying to distinguish where exactly it was
where my smiled
Lay down, gave up and died.

Weakened from my mind's inner war zone turmoil
Your compliments are cynical shrapnel to my confidence
Rebellious relentless disbelieving that I am what I know I am unique and
Pulchritudinous
I walk an unsteady line
tight rope of apprehensiveness
Unconfident
I want just comfortable enough to be myself and just breathe..listen to the drip drop of a waterfall and sleep.
I remind myself to Speak with Conviction
I know
I am no longer powerless
dependent on desperately trying to win your approval, you will never be affectionate
I will not be Subservient or put myself at risk for the harms way of that subjection
Impotent of love you were feeble and weak, feeding on my youth and purity.

I resurrected my heart with the my rocket fuel beating life back into my chest.
It's a combination of
Passion, devotion, infatuation and a couple of years worth of
Tears, and sweat
It's a metronome of my steadiness
Invigorated from my second chance
Defiant to self doubt
I valiantly confront challenges that used to make me shake in my converse shoes.